12-Step Meeting Attendance

Last night, Haleigh and I attended a Narcotics Anonymous (Nar-Anon) meeting at a church in Bartlett, TN. My expectation going into this meeting was that I would hear personal accounts of individuals who have a drug addiction. However, when Haleigh and I first walked in the room, I noticed the facilitator, 2 couples, a single dad and a single mom. The facilitator asked if we were family of, and we replied no, and stated that we were there to witness a real-life group facilitation. They were very accepting and welcoming of us into their group. The group began by stating the 12 steps and traditions; every person went around the room and said each one until everything was said. The facilitator played a facilitative/hands-off role in this group. He started the discussion by talking about he and his wife and their experience with their adult daughter, who is addicted to drugs. He talked about distancing himself from her, and devoting more time to himself and his wife, and finally being able to be happy and live his life again.

The facilitator asked the members to share something they liked from their readings in the Nar-Anon book, and then he asked them to share about what they have learned or experienced from attending Nar-Anon meetings. He didn't push or pressure anyone to answer questions or share, but he encouraged that anyone who wanted to was welcome. I was interested to learn that the members at this particular meeting were not addicts, but family of addicts; mothers and fathers. Interestingly, many of the members had adopted their children, and had little knowledge about their children's home lives before they adopted them. The environment was set up so that the tables made a "C" shape in one of the Bible study rooms. Everyone was able to make eye contact and face each other in a circle, which made the meeting more comfortable for the members.

In my opinion, this group was very therapeutic. One member was in the very beginning stages of his journey, coping with the aftermath of his 20-year-old daughter's drug addiction. Others had multiple children that had been addicted to drugs for many years or were currently in rehab programs or living in a sober living facility. One of the mothers was teary-eyed when she talked about her son and how she can still see the sweet little 8-year-old boy in him. Another member, a father, was more realistic about his son's addiction, and didn't show as much emotion as some of the other members. Either way, members were able to get their point across in a respectful and appropriate way, without fear of judgment or ridicule from others.

I believe this group was geared around the Developmental Frame of Reference, specifically talking about the mastery of skills and coping mechanisms, the interruption of growth, and the impact of the trauma related to the actions made by the addict.